When It’s Hard To Rest
“When It’s Hard to Rest”
Reflection for Churchill Gilford United Churches6th Sunday after Pentecost, July 9, 2023
Krista Moore, M.Div.
Based on Romans 7:15-25a (Paul: Why I Cannot Do What I Want to Do!)
Matthew 11:28-30 (Jesus Offers Rest for the Weary)Back in the high school, I was an exceptional student. It didn’t come easy to me, so I worked really hard, late into the night. I did very well. Top of my class. But it came at a cost.
One time my mom asked me, “Krista, I hope you’re not doing this for us! You don’t need to prove anything to us. We’re already proud of you.”
And that felt good. But I still worked too hard.
It was never enough.
If I got 80, I should have gotten 90.
If I got 90, I should have gotten 100.
There was no “enough” point where I could just relax and be myself. I often felt stressed, forgot to eat, or even cried because I feared I would fail, even though I was succeeding. It’s not like I was competing with my friends. I was competing with myself. And I was my own worst critic.
SCRIPTURE:
When I hear Paul’s letter to the Romans, I hear that same self-critical talk. Paul is trying to be perfect. He does not know how to rest. He is being too hard on himself…
PAUL’S RANT:
“I try to be good, but I just can’t. The minute I try to do the right thing, I do the wrong thing!
“I’m just a bad person. I can’t help it. It’s hopeless!
No matter what I do, it’s not good enough.
I’ll never do the right thing; I’m always going to mess up!!”
Do you know what Paul’s problem is?
Paul thinks it’s all up to him.
He thinks if he just works harder to be perfect, it will happen.
But that’s not true.
No one can be.
I see a lot of myself in Paul. Maybe you do too:
Always trying to please someone, whether it’s God, or your parents, your boss, your husband or wife, neighbours, or friends.
Or some invisible inner critic that says:
‘Work harder! Do more!”
The trouble is, it’s never enough.
BUT there is a solution.
After Paul’s rant where he calls himself wretched, he exclaims:
“Thanks be to God, through our Lord, Jesus Christ!”
What does he mean?
It means, God has our backs. Jesus promises to take care of things. He makes up for what we lack.
In other words, don’t work so hard, don’t worry, don’t beat yourself up!
Take it easy. Take a deep breath.
It’s OK to rest.
STORY
Back to high school.
One night I was studying for an exam, I was so tired. I had already studied two or three hours.
My mom came up to ask if I wanted to take a break and watch a movie with them. I said I still had more work to do, so she went back downstairs.
Truthfully, I felt sorry for myself, wishing I could watch a movie.
Then I thought… Why can’t I? What am I doing this for? Who am I trying to please? I’ve already studied enough! This is not that important.
And then I smelled the popcorn!
And I made the epic decision to go downstairs and watch a movie with my family. And it was so great!
Do you know what it was about?
BABY BOOM. Diane Keaton – “tiger lady” J.C. Wyatt, a driven businesswoman who works in the city, and is very hard-working and successful.
Then a distant cousin dies, and she is left with their baby, an adorable little girl Elizabeth. She decides to put her up for adoption. but then she has second thoughts. She decides that she doesn’t want to live like a workaholic anymore.
Long story short, she moves to a quiet farmhouse in Vermont and raises Elizabeth among the locals. Including farmers (and a very handsome veterinarian – bonus). She makes home-made baby food which becomes a big hit, and has a successful life doing what she loves, with family, friends, and rest.
The tiger lady was no more!
INNISFIL:
It reminds me how we decided to give up our beautiful house in the city, and the hustle and bustle of life in Toronto – for a small quaint place called Innisfil –
where “everybody knows your name,”
where visiting a local farm is a highlight, and praying for rain or sun varies depending on the farmers’ moods that day!
I no longer work myself to death. I still work hard, but I also take breaks – time to sit and watch the world go by. Or smell the flowers.
I have learned to let go of struggling and stressing (well, most of the time). And when I fail, I have Steve to check and make sure I eat, take a break, sit on the deck, dip my foot in the pool, or go for a walk.
I can’t do it alone. No one can. We’re not supposed to.
“Thanks be to God, through our Lord, Jesus Christ!” Paul says. I may say it a differently: “Thank God I’m not alone. Thank God I can let go and enjoy the precious moments of life.
I don’t have to be the tiger lady anymore. I can just be myself.
I can do work that I LOVE AND have a family and enjoy my life. I am grateful I made the right choice that day – to eat the popcorn. And I’m making that same choice again. It’s time to move to Innisfil!
Thank God for Innisfil!
SCRIPTURE – FOR US
Jesus says to all of us today:
“Come to me all you who are weary, and I will give you rest.”
Jesus doesn’t judge whether we are workaholics, or we party too much. He just wants us to stop worrying and trying too hard.
Rely on him more.
Appreciate the life God gave each of us.
Take time to smell the roses, enjoy our family and friends.
Stop worrying all the time. God has our backs.
What we do is enough!
It’s OK to rest.
But how do we do that?
It’s hard because many of us were raised according to the good old Protestant work ethic. Our ancestors believed being idle was a sin, to sit still and do nothing scandalous. They worked their fingers to the bone.
Now don’t get me wrong, this sermon is not about promoting idleness. But balance and rest are important, healthy, and good.
Can we let ourselves rest?
I find it hard to sit still even in summer. To me, summer is supposed to be a time of rest. But of course we are busy getting ready to move, and life continues.
And for farmers, it is near impossible! Summer is when the work gets done until harvest in the fall.
So how can we rest in our different cycles of life and work?
Krista’s Three Things:
1. When you’ve done what you must do, reward yourself with something enjoyable. Better yet, take mini-breaks in between.
2. If you are feeling weary, worried, or overwhelmed, take a deep breath. Ask God for help. Say yes to those who show up.
3. Eat the popcorn and watch the movie! Life is for living; there will always be more work to do, but not more life to live. Live your life now!
May we remember that we are worth so much more than our work. God loves us no matter how hard we work or don’t. Take a moment to breathe and hear Jesus’ words again reminding you to rest:
“Come to me, all you who are weary
and are carrying heavy burdens,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me;
for I am gentle and humble in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Give yourself permission to rest in God’s light.
Thanks be to God, through our Lord, Jesus Christ.
Amen.